Welcome :)

Welcome to my personal Turbo Fire Experience! :)  I have created this blog mostly to keep me accountable to myself, but if I can encourage someone else to take action and get healthy and fit, that would be amazing!  If you have any questions please don't hesitate to ask!  Your health is SO important!  Below I have typed up a condensed version of a little bit about me and my weight struggle.

I am 24 years old and have been married to the man of my dreams, Cody, for a year and 3 months. I started my first diet when I was in 6th grade and since then I have been on pretty much every diet out there. I just could not keep to the minimal amount of calories a day, or the foods I was suppose to eat (Oatmeal every day, chicken and rice every day, same thing every day…did not work for me). I was miserable. Well, I finally lost my baby fat by 8th grade. I was still a little thick, but not fat. I have always had a horrible self image. Right after high school I was 155 pounds, 5’10”, wearing a size 5/7. I met a guy who told me I was fat and needed to lose weight. So I started weight loss pills. Hydroxycut, Rapid Results Rx (or whatever it’s called), I got down to 130-135. Which for my height is not healthy I struggled with starving myself on top of taking the pills, making myself throw up if I did eat something I knew I shouldn’t. I was in a bad place. I finally got out of the "relationship" and a while later met my now husband, Cody. When we first started dating I got mono (not from him, it just developed the doctor said) and I gained a bunch of weight. I finally lost it and was back down to 155 pounds in about 5 months. Then I got on the pill and gained 35 pounds in a month and a half. I didn’t have a scale so I didn’t pay much attention to anything until I went to put on my Summer clothes and I didn’t like what I saw, or how clothes fit! It was a downward spiral from there on. The doctor thought that I just screwed up my body with abusing the weight loss pills and everything. I kind of just gave up hope and tried to accept the fact that I was going to forever be the fat girl. Last Spring I started the HCG diet, I lost 35 pounds on that and felt amazing! Then not even a month afterwards, I became pregnant, then miscarried a few weeks after that…my body is in a crazy place right now! I have gained the 35 pounds back AND THEN SOME! I am now at 240 pounds! I cry almost every time I get in the shower and see myself in the mirror. I am so disgusted and I have no idea how or why I let myself get so far gone I am ready to make a change, I just know that I need a lot of help! So as far as my goals....I would love to fit into my size 5/7 jeans, skirts, small tops, etc. I want to look like I am 155 again (I know that muscle weighs more than fat, so I may not be that weight again, but I will look it). I want to be happy, energized, in shape, I want to feel sexy for my husband again. I want to love the way I look, I have never loved how I looked, even at 155 I thought I was fat. My life goals are to be the best wife, and mother at some point, that I can possibly be and I know that starts by taking care of myself, and loving me for who I am.  I ultimately just want to be HAPPY again. I am so good at putting on a face for everybody…including my husband at times and I want to be done with it. I want to be truly happy.